Late Bloomer

I have no idea if anyone will read this, but I know that when I was pregnant with my daughter (and about to begin studying for my comprehensive exams), I was desperate to hear about the experiences of other grad students who didn't want to wait for that tenure track job before starting a family.  Now that I am on the other side--my daughter is 7  months old, and I am scheduled to take my first comp some time in September of this year (eek!)--I feel I have the responsibility of sharing my experiences so that the next grad school mom or dad to be might feel a little less alone.

I was 30 years old when I entered graduate school at a 2nd tier university in Boston. I was single (although I had just started dating the wonderful man I had no clue I would marry one day), and after spending a year or so managing a restaurant and nightclub, I was accepted into a Judaic Studies program.  I couldn't wait to study, to immerse myself in my work.  

I never, ever imagined I would be interested in getting married, never mind kids.  I had done all kinds of things for a living.  I was a cook for many years, both in New England and down south.  I was a bread baker for a couple of years.  Before that I was booking agent for rock bands.  I had done almost every kind of manual labor imaginable.  I had no regrets--but I was ready to get serious about grad school.  I had put off grad school because I had been, well, put off by academia,  honestly. 

Academics can indeed be a snotty, competitive, geeky lot. From another planet. Out to lunch. But it was more than that (although I have to say, bailing on being stuck hanging out with those folks was a big motivator for putting off getting more degrees).   I just hadn't been ready to commit to, well, much of anything, until I hit 30. 

When I finally got there, every single day felt like a holiday. You know, when your insides are filled with butterflies and you just can't WAIT for the day to start?  I was in love with my work.  I was obsessed.  I drank tons of coffee, read tirelessly, smoked pack after pack of cigarettes (even hand rolled my own ciggies when I was REALLY broke) and slept as little as possible.   I was broke,  I had thrown away any chance of economic stability away on the chance that being a full time grad student in something I was actually good at was the better choice in the long run.  

 Anyway, so I---wait...I think I hear the baby waking up from her nap.  Stay tuned.